Have you ever felt like you’re juggling too many plates, and one more thing — just one — might send them all crashing down?
That’s overwhelm. And if that feels familiar, you’re not alone.
Modern life has a way of piling up: work demands, family needs, social commitments, unexpected curveballs… even the things we enjoy can start to feel like too much when we’re stretched thin. Overwhelm creeps in when it feels like the demands on us exceed our ability to cope.
But the good news? It doesn’t have to stay that way. Overwhelm is a signal — not a sign of failure — and once we understand what it’s telling us, we can begin to ease it.
What overwhelm really feels like
Overwhelm isn’t just “a bit stressed”. It can feel:
- Like your mind is racing but you can’t think clearly
- Like you’re frozen and don’t know where to start
- Like small tasks suddenly feel monumental
- Like you want to cry, scream, or crawl into bed — and maybe all three
It’s often accompanied by tension in the body: tight chest, shallow breathing, clenched jaw. Emotionally, it might feel like anxiety, irritability, numbness, or even guilt — guilt for not “keeping it together”.
Here’s the truth: there is no gold star for doing it all without breaking. If you’re overwhelmed, it’s not because you’re weak — it’s because you’re human.
Why it happens
Overwhelm often builds up gradually, as we push ourselves to keep going even when the signs are there.
Here are a few common contributors:
- Too many responsibilities without time to rest
- Unclear boundaries, especially with work or others’ expectations
- Perfectionism — the belief you have to do everything just right
- Unprocessed emotions or past stress piling up internally
- Unexpected changes or crises that throw everything off balance
And sometimes it’s not even “too much” on paper — it’s just that you are depleted, and even normal things feel heavier.
How to begin easing the weight
The first step out of overwhelm is not to push harder — it’s to pause and acknowledge how you’re feeling.
Here are some practical ways to gently begin easing that overloaded state:
1. Name it, don’t shame it
Simply saying “I feel overwhelmed” — either to yourself or someone else — is a powerful step. Naming it takes it out of the shadows. It reminds you that what you’re feeling is valid, and you’re not alone in it.
2. Breathe and ground
When we’re overwhelmed, our nervous system is often in “fight or flight”. Try this grounding breath:
- Inhale slowly through the nose for 4 counts
- Hold for 2 counts
- Exhale gently through the mouth for 6 counts
Do that a few times. Feel your feet on the ground. Let your shoulders drop.
Even 30 seconds of this can help shift your state and create a little inner space.
3. Break it down
Instead of looking at the whole mountain, ask: What’s one small, manageable step I can take right now?
You don’t need to tackle everything at once. Prioritise. Postpone. Say no. Sometimes just writing everything down in a list gets it out of your head and onto paper — which can instantly feel lighter.
4. Lower the bar (yes, really)
This is the opposite of giving up. It’s giving yourself realistic expectations. Maybe today isn’t the day to conquer your inbox or clean the house top to bottom.
Maybe today is about doing what needs doing — and leaving space for rest.
5. Ask for support
You don’t have to carry everything by yourself. Whether it’s asking a loved one for help, delegating something at work, or speaking to a counsellor — support isn’t weakness, it’s wisdom.
You weren’t meant to do life alone.
What relief can look like
Relief from overwhelm doesn’t always mean everything is fixed or tidy. It can be as simple as:
- Feeling like you can breathe again
- Knowing your feelings are allowed
- Gaining clarity about your next step
- Being reminded that it’s okay to slow down
Sometimes, just feeling heard and seen — by yourself or someone else — makes a world of difference.
In closing: You’re not failing. You’re just full.
There’s no prize for pushing yourself past breaking point. Overwhelm is your mind and body’s way of saying, “Something needs to change.”
And change doesn’t always have to be dramatic. It can begin with one deep breath, one honest conversation, one moment of letting yourself off the hook.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to start, I’m here to help. Together, we can explore what’s weighing you down — and gently begin to make space for something lighter.
